NINJA VOWS AND FLASHMOBS

OMG you may be thinking but ‘the times they are a changing’. Many couples want to move away from the traditional conservative style of ceremony, and inject a bit of fun, even hilarity into their marriage ceremony.

A flashmob is something that is taking hold, and involves the guests in a rather spectacular way - they thing is, it sort of only works if the couple themselves has no idea of what’s about to unfold.

Ninja vows, however are a different matter. Can you imagine writing the vows your beloved will speak to you in front of your guests"? What’s more, can you imagine, seeing your vows, the words that you are about to speak to your beloved, for the very first time at the moment you have to utter them!

Give it a few moments to sink in, what an ultimate act of faith and trust….and I suspect some pretty funny results to delight everybody present!

Ii will leave you with an edgy and pretty ‘side splitting’ version of the old fashioned ‘Asking’, and it works for any couple, not just the heterosexual variety!

Celebrant: Will you love him if he’s rich?
Will you love her in a ditch?
From today until the end of time,
Even if his words don’t rhyme?

Groom: I will love her if she’s rich
Bride: And I will love him in a ditch
Groom: And I will even love her when she’s being a b…eautiful princess.

Celebrant: Will you love him for richer, for poorer,
Will you love her for quiet or snorer,
From today until the cows come home,
And never stop writing goofy poems?

Bride: I will love him if he’s poor.
Groom: I will love her if she snores.
Bride: And I will love him when he’s a bore.

Celebrant: Will you love with all your heart?
Will you love till death do you part?
Will you have and forever hold,
Each others’ hearts ‘till the stars grow cold?

Bride and Groom: I will love her/him forever a thousand fold,
‘Till death do us part and our blood grow cold,
Groom: Or until our brains grow mold.

Celebrant: Will you love through good and bad?
Will you love in times happy and sad?

Bride and Groom: I will love her/him through good and bad,
And in times happy and sad.
Bride: Cause he’s the best friend I ever had.

Celebrant: Will you take him as your mate?
Will you have her as your date?
From this day on and ever more,
No matter what your life may have in store?

Bride and groom: I will have her/him as my mate,
Starting on this our wedding date.
Bride: May as well, as it’s our fate.

Celebrant: If you’ll be wed through and through,
Please answer with the words:

Bride and Groom: I do!